The Capitalist: Tories disco through decline, trouble at Harper Collins and Mishcon’s ‘party from hell’
Tory Conference, chaos at Harper Collins and Mishcon de Reya’s “party from hell”; catch up on the latest gossip in this week’s The Capitalist
Tories disco through decline
Despite lagging behind Labour and Reform in the polls, rumours of a leadership coup swirling and local campaigners for the party leaving en masse, confidence in the Conservative Party was bulging in some quarters at this year’s party conference.
At the LGBT+ Tories party, frontbenchers got dancing to cheesy disco hits while an MC bigged up officials in the VIP area. The DJ then whacked on Mousse T’s saucy hit ‘Horny’, singing “I’m Tory – Tory, Tory, Tory”.
Shadow health secretary Stuart Andrew was asked – in front of hundreds of staffers and hacks – whether he was “horny or Tory”. His response: “I’m a horny Tory”. We’ll probably get a new Tory pledge on how they plan to boost fertility rates in no time at all.
But Andrew’s vigour was the exception at this year’s Manchester jamboree, where half-empty rooms were just one sign of a party fighting for relevancy. Chocolate bars handed out by Kemi Badenoch’s team, on which the slogan ‘When Labour negotiates, Britian loses’ (sic) was proudly printed, were a further signal that even the party elect are struggling to care.
Another clear sign that conference was less well attended than previous years was that it was actually possible to get a drink at the bar. But given the prices, hacks particularly lamented the absence of lobbyists with expense accounts.
The best joke at Conservative Party Conference, however, came from Lord Craig Mackinlay, who is a quadruple amputee following a severe bout of sepsis in 2023: “I knew Labour would cost an arm and a leg but I didn’t expect this!”
Summit’s up
The Financial Times claims to take its “commitment to protecting human rights very seriously” – so it raised an eyebrow at The Capitalist to see a certain President Brice Oligui Nguema on the speaking roster at the newspaper’s upcoming Africa Summit. Nguema, who came to power in 2023 after a military coup, stands accused by Noureddin Bongo, the son of former leader Ali, of kidnap and torture, including “electrocution”, “drowning” and “strangulation”. It was only following help from fellow Old Etonians Boris Johnson and Zac Goldsmith that Noureddin was released after almost two years; Nguema’s regime denies torture and a case is ongoing in a Paris Court.
The FT fails to mention the coup or the subsequent allegations in its Africa Summit promo material, instead praising Nguema’s “brilliantly obtained” baccalaureate and his “bravery, courage and hard work”. When contacted by The Capitalist the FT said it interviews “a wide range of individuals as part of our commitment to independent journalism and scrutiny of those in positions of influence. Speakers at our events are subject to the same open scrutiny we use in our journalism.”
Sponsors including Bank of America and World Bank were conspicuously quiet when approached.
The ‘Fyre festival of legal parties’
Spare a thought for the stressed-out lawyers at Mishcon de Reya, who had been promised an annual party to remember. Herded onto coaches for an anticipation-building journey to their ‘secret destination’ they emerged moments later outside the old Odeon cinema on Shaftesbury Avenue for what guests subsequently dubbed “the Fyre festival of legal parties” and “the party from hell,” according to legal blog Roll on Friday which reported the bash had barely any food, no loos, surly staff and “unbearable conditions”. If that wasn’t bad enough, the would-be party goers had to sit through a “bizarre” session where Emily Maitlis interviewed management about their bold and exciting new strategy. The firm’s chief brand officer sent an all-staff email the next morning, saying “we are sorry” and “we will make it up to you”.
Les miserables at Harper Collins
It’s been a busy week of headlines at News UK – just not on the usual floors. Just a day after Harper Collins UK CEO Charlie Redmayne resigned with no comment, it’s emerged that the publisher has been forced to apologise to Melania Trump regarding claims made in a recent book that the First Lady had been introduced to her husband through Jeffrey Epstein.
In a statement, the publisher said they had “removed several passages” from Andrew Lownie’s “Entitled: The Rise and Fall of the House of York” that referenced unverified claims about the First Lady” and that copies of the book including those references were being permanently removed from distribution. No doubt a blow for the publisher, though word on the street the real thing that’s got Harper Collins employees down is the loss of Charlie Redmayne’s half brother Eddie, a regular at the publisher’s annual summer party.
Rolling out the tartan carpet
To Boisdale, the world’s only (probably) venue specialising in both Scottish food and reggae music, where The Capitalist walked the tartan carpet for this year’s Boisdale Xerjoff Music Awards. Presented by Jools Holland and Rebecca Fergusson, guests enjoyed a healthy stream of Old Fashioneds and Warsaw Mules to toast the best talent across jazz, blues, R&B, reggae, pop, rock and DJ culture. Major honours included the Legacy Award for Musical Excellence for Guy Chambers and the Lifetime Achievement Award presented to Boy Wonder, while Joss Stone was crowned British icon.
Skyscanner X Katherine Ryan
Skyscanner bent over backwards to do as little talking as possible at their annual travel trends briefing at Dovetale on Tuesday night. An introductory speech from a Reddit representative felt a little odd given it was a Skyscanner event, but even more confusing was the appearance of comedian Katherine Ryan, whose set (which somehow hit all of Skyscanner’s 2026 talking points while also being genuinely funny) suggested the flight-comparison website is doing rather well.
Heavily pregnant with her fourth child, Ryan apologised for falling in with the trad wife trend before regaling the audience with her own travel highlights, not least Dubai, which she endorsed as “totally worth the controversy”, describing it as “like America but with better rights for women”. As for the rest of the evening, London’s travel writers were treated to their ultimate catnip (freebies), with a spin-the-wheel for skincare (nodding to the trend for beauty travel) and stacked shelves of international snacks for journalists to take supermarket-sweep style.